All posts filed under: Being

Standards Not Expectations 

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Welcome to my 555 series! Please read the introduction to this project {here}.  Week 4 Post 2 “Have standards not expectations.  Standards are something you have for yourself, and expectations are something you have for someone else. And you control yourself you don’t control other people. If you say that you don’t accept a certain kind of behavior or treatment, people who fit that standard and treat you that way fit into your life, and people who don’t are out. Whereas if you’re like ‘I expect you to do this, that, and the other,’ that’s not something you have control over, so you’re setting yourself up to be unhappy.”  ~Daphne Oz    

What Stephen Said

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Welcome to my 5 5 5 series.  Read my project introduction here. Wk 3 Post 2  Because at this point in life, the quote below is something most of us can relate to, either about another bird, or about ourselves.   “Some birds are not meant to be caged, that’s all. Their feathers are too bright, their songs too sweet and wild. So you let them go, or when you open the cage to feed them they somehow fly out past you. And the part of you that knows it was wrong to imprison them in the first place rejoices, but still, the place where you live is that much more drab and empty for their departure.”  -Stephen King    

Smells Like A Teenager’s Spirit 

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Welcome to my 5 5 5 series. The objective of this exercise is to write five lines five times a week for five weeks, to get me back into a regular post writing habit.  Read my introduction here. Wk 2 Post 5 He will text things out of the blue saying, “Hello you,” or asking, “What are you doing?” I know how friends check in on each other, and that’s okay, expected even with our friends. But he & I are not ‘friends’, we are  amicable acquaintances. Something about his check-ins seem flirtatious. It was kind of charming when we were sixteen, but now that we’re forty, he’s just a creepy old guy.

Four Things I’ve Heard & One Thing I’ve Said 

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Welcome to my 5 5 5 series. The objective of this exercise is to write five lines five times a week for five weeks, to get me back into a regular post writing habit. Habits don’t create themselves, after all. The parameters of frequency & amount of sentences/ lines will remain throughout this series, while the topics and format can be varied. Read my introduction here. Wk 2 Post 4 “Yeah, we’re seeing each other, I like him… I mean, he’s okay- at least he SEEMS normal, like he has…. you know… a job.” “What? You haven’t tried coke yet? It’s super fun, you’ll love it!” “Only with you can I mention being drawn to cows chewing grass through wire and get my manifesto in the process!!” “They don’t give a sh!t if I curse in front of them, I mean look at them- they can’t f#ckin’ hear me!” “Gosh I really dont feel like getting sweaty right now, I worked so hard last night to moisturize.”

Over the Overwhelm

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Welcome to my 5 5 5 series. The objective of this exercise is to write five lines five times a week for five weeks about anything. Habits don’t create themselves, after all. The frequency & length remains from post to post, but the topics will be varied. Read my introduction here.  Wk 2 Post 3 The heart of the matter is getting organized, because until you do, you won’t be able to take the internal pressure of not knowing what you’re doing much longer.  Start a notebook for listing out everything you know you have to do between today and the end of the year, writing small progress notes in the margins, and using tabs if you need to.  Map everything out on a calendar using  color coded pens to keep things clear and time sensitive.  Set alerts on your phone & stick updated  post-it reminders on the bathroom mirror, the refrigerator, on the shoe closet door, and on your remote control.  Tell your friends, “I am soooo over being overwhelmed,”  and need to bow …

No Title 

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Welcome to my 5, 5, 5 series. The objective of this exercise is to write five lines five times a week for five weeks about anything. Habits don’t create themselves, after all. The frequency & length remains from post to post, but the topics will be varied. Read my introduction here.  Wk 2 Post 2 Writing five lines limits the amount of time it takes for me to overly criticize & dissect a post until I’m convinced that it’s “just right“.   Writing five lines frequently during the week means I can repurpose that way-too-unrelated thought that came up just now into another short post tomorrow. Writing five lines is usually very simple. Writing five lines is often very complicated. I’m happy I’m finally on my fifth line for this entry.   

Being a Damsel is Distressing

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Wk 1 Post 5 Like those whiny damsels in disaster, for whom lines like: “Let’s leave her behind, man, she’s slowing us down,” were written, I blurted out, “I can’t!” “Always say ‘I Can’ even if you can’t,” the most rigid of my instructors replied to me while I flailed on the mat. “Teachers don’t let their students think they can’t,” she said with conviction. “Even if it doesn’t look right & it feels like you can’t do it,” she went on, while circling the room, “why not just tell yourself that you already can & keep working on it?”   Jolted by her words about yoga (& life), I thought, “True- I’m too old for this damsel in distress sh*t anyway.”  Welcome to my 5, 5, 5 series. The objective of this exercise is to write five lines five times a week for five weeks about anything. Habits don’t create themselves, after all. The frequency & length remains from post to post, but the topics will be varied. Read my introduction here.

Captain America To The Rescue 

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Wk 1 Post 4 I was sobbing, just sobbing, on the couch all afternoon. Captain America called me after my hopeless sad gal text and said, “You’re going to freshen up, get dressed, and go outside for a walk while I stay on the phone with you,” which she did, for two hours as I navigated the sidewalks downtown teary eyed but soon laughing with her in my ear. Many years before this, after camping with literally a million people to hear public mass with Pope John Paul ii, I struggled in the following day’s heat to trek towards our return shuttle with my backpack. Captain America grabbed it from me and carried it in addition to all of her gear while leading our group in her encouraging tone, “C’mon, let’s go, you can do it.”  We all need superheroes. Welcome to my 5, 5, 5 series.  The objective of this exercise is to write five lines five times a week for five weeks about anything. Habits don’t create themselves, after all. The frequency & …

Before 5 a.m.

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Welcome to my 5, 5, 5 series. The objective of this exercise is to write five lines five times a week for five weeks about anything. Habits don’t create themselves, after all. The frequency & length remains from post to post, but the topics will be varied. Read my introduction here. Wk 1 Post 3 Sometimes I wish my whole life could happen under the covers before 5 a.m., without worry or concern for what might shake me within the other 17 hours of the day. That moment when I start to stir before I am supposed to be up, with my eyes just fluttering open in complete darkness. That moment before all the practicality of the day ahead squeezes the romance out of the dawn. This is the moment I wish I could stay in. Is it life or is it us that does the squeezing?

5 5 5  Introduction 

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Wk 1 Post 1 Write five lines, five times a week, for five weeks.  That’s all. That is all I need to do.  If I write five lines I am all set, whether they follow a theme or not. At The Hello Sessions over the weekend, Lisa Congdon spoke on one of my favorite topics, the buzz worthy “passion project”, and how it informs a person’s ability to push beyond his or her usual thinking and creates ways for one to work differently through this side focus. I thought of about four things I’ve wanted to work on for a specific period of time: Participating in Snail Mail My Email in November. Being able to do a proper headstand and handstand. Something else I can’t remember that I guess was not important. 5 5 5 For the purposes of informing my public writing practice, I am going with 5, 5, 5.  The objective of this exercise is to write five liner posts five times a week for five weeks about anything I want to (which I have always done …